single or couple??

Dear bloggy,

i am in dilemma, a month ago i broke up with him and that was the most painful period for me and i told myself not to let myself to be hurt again.....during that single time though its a bit bored because i am all alone in a sudden...one day after the break i met a guy....he is the person who helds me up when i am really down...he shows me the real face of a man....during that time we talked a lot bout my boyfriend and he helps me to reveal Mr.K real face and i actually knew it only at that time...during that period of time we talked a lot and we seems to know what we are thinking and what we wants....he has a girlfriend too...i even think of activities that he and his girlfriend can do...and when he quarrels with his girl i will help him to think for his girl till finally he is satisfied and no longer mad at her...and we actually fell for each other...though i knew he is already occupied by his girl but i think that was just a crush between him and me...when he actually told me he has a girl and we both made an agreement...we said that we shall not fall for each other for any reason...ok den day by day we SMS each other like every moment when we are free and we called each other every night...we talked, we laugh... that time i can say i was really happy... i have no worries for who i am going out with, where i am going out with or even what i do...i am as free as a bird high high up in the skies...and i started to feel like it was a right choice for me to leave Mr. K....then one fine day when i was happily enjoy shopping moment with my friends Mr. K called me and he said he got things to tell me...deep in my heart i know i am dead again...i am falling into his trap again...i knew it!! but yet i listen to him...and at that right moment i felt a sudden guilt in me...i feel like i have betrayed de new guy...i feel like i am tearing apart between Mr.K and him...i dowan to leave de new guy because i really feel happy when i am with him.....but when Mr.K talked with me i have this flash back memories when i was with him....so i am in great dilemma...i called the new guy and tell him everything and he told me...since we have tried so hard and i thought u finally let go of him but u did not....he knows that u are easily convinced people thats why he is coming back to u again...i tell no please don't let him hurt u again...he do not deserve to have u...and u deserve somebody that is so much better than him....when i heard this i was crying and i was speechless...then i hang up the phone and think...i was so confused and suffering....i have one whole chaos week...i don eat don't sleep...i keep on thinking of the problem....i do not know where or who to talk to....i was so deppressed...and finally after few times of considering and thinking i left the new guy and goes back to Mr. K...but when i am with him i feel like i do not have the feeling for him anymore and moreover he told me that when we broke up he actually found a girl to replace me but he couldn't continue because he still have feelings towards me...i wanted to tell him so badly that i do not feel the same at him anymore like last time...but i did not i did not want to hurt him like how he hurt me....i knew it is very hurt when this kind of words come from someone u loved so much...so i choose not to tell him...i keep to myself but recently i found out that i actually mind the fact that he being together with someone whom i know and i felt betrayed...though i betrayed him before...but i am that kind of person who is so selfish and really mind when somebody touch my stuff without my permission.....and i feel like telling him that i mind but i am afraid that i will hurt him....i know that if i did not settle this problem...it will be carried till after we are married and one day it will be a big big problem to our marriage....sigh...i really mind and i do not want to hurt him at the same time....i got a feelign like this problem will drive me crazy sooner or later..but i do not have the gut to do it....HELP ME!!!!